What You Should Know About Screen Time and a Child Therapist’s Helpful Perspective

By: Madison Martinez, LCSW

Living in this day and age, technology is a huge part of our everyday lives. Adults, teenagers, kids, and even babies utilize screens in one way or another. Screens are everywhere. As a parent, you may have found yourself wondering: “How much is too much?” In this blog, we will share state recommendations of screen times for children and adolescents and a therapist's perspective on how to help when emotional or behavioral dysregulation occurs in relation to screen time.

Screen Time Recommendations

Everyone uses screens. The duration, frequency, content and purpose for its use, and even child reactions will vary from person to person or family to family. The state of Utah has adopted the same screen time recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). They suggest that children 0-18 months should only use screens when video-chatting people they know. Ages 18-24 month olds should have limited screen time to less than an hour a day, with programs that are age appropriate, interactive, and educational. For 2-5 years old, screen time looks like one hour a day, with parents monitoring content. For children ages 6 and up, their maximum screen time should be limited to two hours. 

Now, if your child is using more than the recommended screen time limits, please don’t panic. You are not alone in this, nor are you a bad parent. Screens have become a core part in education, entertainment, free time, social connection, alone time, and more. They are easily accessible to help get through a long day, or to get something completed like making dinner or a quick phone call without interruptions; sometimes even parents need to catch their breath or get some quiet time. These things do not mean you have failed, it means you are human. We want to remind you that parenting isn’t about getting everything perfect, it’s about being connected, making adjustments, and showing up again tomorrow. 

What Does Dysregulation Look Like with Screens? 

It is extremely important to note that screens are designed to be very stimulating. Examples include having fast-paced visuals, bright colors, different noises, and instant rewards. In young children this stimulation can cause overactivation. This means, when the screen turns off, their nervous system is still experiencing the stimulation. This is when you may start to see emotional or behavioral dysregulation. Examples include: Aggression, yelling, crying, outburst, inability to follow directions or transition to the next task, etc. These are symptoms your child is dysregulated. 

Tips On How We Can Avoid Screen Dysregulation

In therapy, a therapist's goal is to understand the family dynamic and how the family functions as a whole. You may have tried some of these strategies, some may be new to you, or you may feel like it sounds too easy to work. All of that might be true, and your therapist is going to challenge you to try again. The difference is that we may ask you to focus on the delivery of the strategy and the consistency of using it. Children are innately aware of minor communication patterns, such as parental tone of voice, facial expressions, and body language. How we communicate with children is just as important as what we are communicating to them.

Some realistic tips include:

-Giving a 10 minute, 5 minute, 3 minute, and 1 minute warning before screens need to be turned off. Your child may not need as many reminders, a 10 minute and 5 minute warning may work just as well. Find what works best for you and your family!

-Visual timers are amazing to help the child' s brain turn the abstract of time into a concrete form of time. It is visible and helps reduce anxiety/power struggles due to the child being aware in a tangible way.

Additional helpful skills may include:

-Parents limiting their screen utilization, especially in front of children.

-Keeping screens out of all bedrooms.

-Turning screens off at least 1 hour before bed, avoiding screens at mealtimes,and  turning the TV and other devices off when not using them.

-In cases when you need to tell your child “No, you can’t have screens,” you can try to tell them what they can do instead by giving them options. Example: “We can’t play on the iPad right now; we can color or find a toy to play with.” 

Screen time is complex and change can be hard. We are encouraging you to start with one small shift this week and build up from there. Figure out what works best for your child and family. You are already on the right track by being here!