What Your Child’s Therapist Wants You to Know and Use Outside the Office
Taking the step to have your child see a counselor can be scary. You may not be sure what to expect. It will cost time and money. You may not be sure about what the expectations are for you, as the parent of this child entering therapy. While all therapists have their own style and approach, you can rest assured that there are a few things they want you to know as you begin.
Play is a Good Thing
Most therapists will utilize play in some way, shape, or form as they work with your child. The intensity or volume of the play will likely depend on their training or background. Some therapists use more of a talk therapy approach, with little play involved. This can work well with older children who are able to use words to communicate what they’re feeling. However, for younger children, this may not be as conducive. They don’t have the language capabilities that older children and adults do.
For this purpose, you will want someone with a strong knowledge and background in play therapy. Play becomes the child’s words and the therapist can help translate them to you as a parent. You may hear statements like, “We just played.” This is true. But you can also rest assured that the child’s therapist is hard at work using techniques like reflecting emotions, modeling, and tracking the child’s experience in the room. These experiences will translate to the outside world, where you will see changes at home. At Become You Therapy, we have a dedicated team with extensive training and certification in play therapy. You may also be asked to incorporate a little play at home!
Start by Talking About Feelings Often
Oftentimes, we will ask parents to talk more openly about feelings at home. It’s not that we intentionally don’t talk about emotions, but we’re often so focused on getting all the chores, homework, and activities done that we can forget how beneficial it is to talk about them daily. Adults may also be sending messages to children inadvertently that feelings aren’t something discussed in the home. We want home to be a place where all feelings can be shared respectfully and understood. Your child’s therapist may ask you to simply check-in about one feeling your child had during the day. They may also ask you to model this and have other family members do the same. The more you talk about feelings at home, the more you will see a change in your child’s ability to communicate how they think and feel.
Spend Time Doing Anything Together
Families are busy. Between work, family obligations, child activities, and school, it’s a wonder there’s any time for anything else. One of the most important things we can do to support children though, is to create a daily routine of spending time with them. Caregivers often think this needs to be big gestures, like family trips or things that cost a lot of money. The reality is quite the opposite. Your child will benefit more from the minute things that occur every day in your routine. By asking them to go to the grocery store or help fix dinner with you, you’re sending a message that you care about the time you spend with them. Your child’s therapist would ask you to highlight how important these activities are to you by saying something like, “I really loved getting to hang out with you today!” This solidifies and lets your child know that it’s important to them, and you.
These three aspects may seem like small details. While this is true, our therapists often find that these small activities make a larger impact on children. The more intentional you can be about your experiences with your children, the more you can create a lasting impact, whether they are in the therapy room or out in the world.
